Archives for December 2016


Elliot’s Home Birth

Elliot is 3 weeks today. It goes so fast, and the memory of labor fades so fast. I was definitely traumatized after my Home Birth with Audrey. Not because of the location but because of the birth. Giving birth at home has been wonderful. I actually feel spoiled. With this pregnancy I was high risk for pre-term labor so we were involved with a hospital until 37 weeks. We toured the hospital and I almost cried. It was so cold, so restrictive, so unfamiliar and uncomfortable. I know some people feel safe there, but that is not how I would have felt. I was so excited to make it past 37 weeks so I could have another home birth. I mean, its your HOME! It’s where you rest and raise your family. I can’t think of a better location to add to my family.

I went into labor 38 weeks and 6 days. It was November 14, 2016 when things started happening. I woke up that morning at 5am because I was losing my mucus plus and cramping. Tom and I decided to just go about our day and wait and see what happened. I was having contractions and I thought “today is the day!”. Well as the day went on I started feeling more normal and less like it was gonna happen. We went to gymnastics and ran some errands. All the while I was seeing that it wasn’t going to happen unless we intervened. I texted Tom that afternoon and told him to come home early so we could DTD. That is what got Audrey to come so I thought we would give it a try. Unfortunately I didn’t time it right.

He got home at around 5pm and we DTD. We went to Wal-Mart, haha just like we did before Audrey came. I was fine at Walmart, no contractions. I didn’t think DTD was going to work this time since it had been a few hours and nothing was happening. We went home and ate some dinner. Then we started watching a show at 9pm which is when things started. I was getting regular contractions and I was getting a little nervous. I was up since 5am and going non-stop so I was pretty tired at this point. I decided to go to bed and try to sleep in hopes that the contractions would go away and let me get some rest. Instead they just got more intense and closer together.

By the time Tom came to bed at 10:30pm I was pretty uncomfortable and had to get out of bed. He fell right asleep and I started walking around the house. The contractions in the bed were SO painful compared to the ones I had after I got up. I walked around the house until my contractions moved 3-4 minutes apart. It was around 1:30am at this time and I texted the midwife to let her know what was happening. At this point I had been awake almost 24 house :(. So much for being well rested for labor. I was tired. With Audrey I was able to sleep between contractions, but with Elliot my contractions started painful and pretty close. I was not able to sleep between contractions and they didn’t let up. I went to wake Tom up and let him know that it was happening.

After he got up we decided that he would check me. Well he said he couldn’t feel anything…….. I was also having painful contractions 3-4 minutes apart still. We texted the midwife and she said she was on her way. I got into the tub to see if it would help. I felt like I was pretty far along and my contractions were getting more painful.

The midwife arrived and she set up and checked me. We were excited to see how accurate Tom was at checking since with Audrey he refused to check haha. Tom had said he didn’t feel anything so I was hoping to be past 7cm. Unfortunately Robin checked and said I was 6cm. UGH! That means transition is still on it’s way. I think I had forgotten completely how painful labor really was because I was just starting.

Transition came and refreshed my memory…….joy. With Audrey I had only back labor. With Elliot I had a mix of both. It started as abdomen contractions but by the time he started switching positions I was having both abdomen and back labor. The transition contractions were just as hellish as ever. Lasting 1-2 minutes with 2 pain peaks. I had forgotten all about the contractions with 2 peaks. They are the worst! I was moaning through these now. Up until 6cm I was making it through rather gracefully. Not anymore.

We checked again and this time Robin felt some scar tissue keeping my cervix closed. The scar tissue was from a cone biopsy surgery I had in August 2015. This part is painful….. She used her fingers to rip open the scar tissue YIKES. My OBGYN mentioned that this would be rare, but possible. She also said that they would break the scar tissue open after the epidural haha! Little did she know that wasn’t going to be happening. But it was done and it was painful but survivable….like childbirth. After I wanted to get into the tub again.

The tub was nice. With Audrey we used an inflatable pool and I did NOT like that. It was too big and I kind of bobbed around in it. I was able to use my bathtub with Elliot and it was a good size. It didn’t make the contractions less painful for me, but it did help me relax between them. The warm water was soothing. I stayed in there for a long time. At one point my midwife went to listen to the baby’s heartbeat and she heard some decels. This caused some concern. So yet another incredibly painful part of my labor. My midwife needed to feel what the baby was doing during a contraction, which meant she needed her fingers in me. AH that did not feel good. She discovered that the baby was way out of position now and we would have to wait for him to get into proper position for birth. I was almost 10 cm at this point.

So far 10cm has mean ‘Congratulations! Now the real work begins because you can’t push until your baby starts engaging’. In the movies it means you’re almost done lol! But for me, not so much.

At this point I was advised to walk, go up stairs, sit on the toilet. Basically anything to move this baby back into position. At one point I laid down on the bed and the midwife tried to turn him as I pushed. Then we tried to keep pushing to see if it would force him down into position……fail. So back to the toilet.

I HATE the toilet during contractions. It hurts so bad. I couldn’t sit there very long. I got up and started going up and down the stairs. It didn’t take very long after that. I was at the top of the stairs and I braced myself for another VERY painful contraction. These contractions were screaming contractions. They are the contractions that make you think “I can’t do this!!!!!!”. I certainly felt like I could not make it. I was in pain for so long and now there was no end in sight. We didn’t know when or if he would ever engage properly. But this contraction was the one where he dropped into position.

I immediately felt this painful pressure. It’s hard to describe because when I was feeling it I wouldn’t describe it as pressure. It was INTENSE! I knew something was different. It took my breath away. The midwives needed me to make it back downstairs where their supplies were but I couldn’t move. I waited for a few minutes before slowly walking down. Tom basically had to carry me because my legs would not go down the stairs. It was so difficult, but I made it back to the room and onto the bed.

Robin checked me and said he dropped and was in position – WOHOOO thank you GOD! I started pushing. Pushing was hard, but I felt my body assisting me. I would feel a contraction come and then I’d push which seemed to trigger my body to help. When the contraction was gone I would rest. My midwife helped guide me through the pushing like with Audrey. I guess my body was yet again exhausted after a long labor and lack of sleep. It took 14 minutes but it felt a lot longer. Oh and lets not forget that I had to crown TWICE! He came to a full crown and then the contraction was over. I stopped pushing and his head slowly went all the way back in. My midwives told me that was the first time they’ve seen the head go back so far lol. Just my luck. So with the next contraction my midwife told me I had to get him back to crowning. I pushed through the SECOND ring of fire. Which was worse than what I had felt with Audrey. Maybe because I did it twice, but I was able to get his head completely out the second time. I took a break and waited for the next contraction to come. Now it was time for his body. The whole time I was pushing I was remembering what I did with Audrey and what I needed to do different this time. My main focus was less yelling and more closed mouth pushes. So when it was time for the body I made sure to close my mouth and push with all my strength. Robin found the cord around his neck and loosened it before he came out. After that he slid out very peacefully. Of course I felt relief and complete amazement that I had done it again. Each birth I had absolutely NO idea how to make it through and at the end you look back and think “how the hell did I do that?”. It’s crazy! Something so amazing as childbirth is really a miracle. They put him on me and he was SO slimy. It was kind of gross to be honest lol. I literally couldn’t hold onto him because he was so slick.

He cried and I relaxed. Robin and Julie worked on everything down south while we looked at Elliot. He was a very sleepy baby unlike Audrey. He had no interest in looking around really. Audrey was bright eyed and bushy tailed the second she came out. Elliot was more like – ok now I’m going back to bed. My uterus was tired again so it was having some issues – like with Audrey but not as severe. The midwives had it under control and I delivered the placenta shortly after. I don’t remember having to push to deliver Audrey’s placenta but I did with Elliot. It was a long time ago so I could have forgotten……. or blocked it from my memory haha. At the end of Audrey’s birth I was loosing blood so my recollection of everything is very foggy. With Elliot it seems a lot clearer and I was not traumatized. It was incredibly hard, but it was childbirth. It confirmed my feeling that Audrey’s birth was traumatizing and unusually difficult. I had some fear that maybe my birth with Audrey was how they all were and I was just weak. But no, Elliot was a lot easier. Still super painful, but in a weird way easier and more natural for my body.

Now here I am 1 month post partum and doing great. My recovery was so easy this time. The next day I felt great! I was still sore, but I wasn’t bed ridden and using a bed pan. I got up and gave myself a nice bath. Elliot would have slept all day if I didn’t wake him up to eat. He was a really lazy baby the first 2 weeks. Audrey was a lot more engaged and high maintenance. Hopefully it’s going to be a personality trait – low maintenance.

If you guys want to watch my birth video here it is! I’m SO SO SO SO ¬†glad to be on the other side.